This is going to sound cliche and like a bitter New Yorker, but I swear I would write this even if I came from the opposite of New York, like... Nevada.

Red Sox fans are SO. ANNOYING.*

Like a team if you want. Even LOVE a team. Put their bumper sticker on your car and make-out with a team if you want. What do I care? Except when you start your CRAZY LOUD SCREAMING ANNOYING VOICES, it really gets to me.

Red Sox fans are like those annoying people who cut you in the "10 items max" line at the supermarket clearly holding 26 items. They are also like the people who do not know how to merge onto route 22 in Pennsylvania. And finally, they are like THOSE people who talk through an entire movie that you just paid $16 to see and your suspension of disbelief is broken by IDIOTS jabbering on about the f'ing Red Sox.
And don't go giving me the old sob story about how they hadn't won in like 500 years until two years ago boo hoo Sox players. Their pants are baggy and their hair is ugly. And there is no 'charm' to this look:

Do yourselves a favor: clean up your act, get a haircut and wear tighter pants. Look presentable. Like a Yankee.

*If you are a Red Sox fan and a friend or a reader of this site, my apologies. You are probably not as annoying as the other Sox fans.


Anonymous said...


i finally grew into my bloodlines this summer and became a full-blown red sox fan (thanks grandma!)

btw, Manny Ramirez (in the pic) is crazy but he's a damn good baseball player.

and don't give me that crap about us not winning ... what's worse is listening to yankees fans go on and on about ALL the championships they won ...

let us have our moment of glory (even though we're not there yet!)


bec said...

I am a bit hurt by your post jepting!!!!! maybe i won't move out in december now!!
love bec, a non annoying red sox fan

p.s. you chose the WORST looking/most obnoxious player EVER to include your rant

Anonymous said...

It truly amazes me that someone from NY could write a post about this... I am from Boston and I can't tell you how annoying Yankee fans have been over the past 10 years.. you really have got to be kidding with your rant about the red sox - the yankees invented everything you're talking about! The only reason the yankees are quiet now is because their reign is over! Funny how the tide has changed!

steve said...

you trying to up the hits to your site there sister? you're heading into some miiighhtyy controversial waters..be careful or you might get baseballs thrown through your car windows.

but I am with you; yanks all the way

Jen said...

Haha... I knew I was fishing for trouble on that one. I suppose all is fair in love and baseball; and regardless of how Ramirez dresses, he (and not the Yanks) will be in the World Series.

Touché, my friends, touché.

Moriah said...

I think the carefree sense of style the Red Sox adopt is refreshing! Plus our players will bring food to fans waiting in line, and will take over behind the counter at Game On near Fenway and serve everyone beers in celebration after a big win!

The Red Sox mentality is akin to my own sensibilities... Comb my hair when I feel like it, dance a little jig in my underpants, have a nostalgic love relationship with a big green monster (and I don't mean money), and in general let Moriah be Moriah the way we let Manny be Manny. See? Refreshing! Not holding 26 items in the express lane in the grocery store. More like, skip the groceries, have a beer instead!

Gregory Sullivan said...

Agreed, but aren't all us fans annoying?

I assure you, I am the first to get my knickers in a twist over how Sox fans let their comparatively miniscule success spill out of their mouths any chance they get. They are like the kid brother who won't shut up after winning their first arm wrestling match. I don't begrudge them their wins (as they will surely triumph this year again,) but good GOD, they are nowhere near bragging rights.

Equally annoying, are YANKEE FANS. I sat in the stands with you. I've cheered with you. I've rejoiced and wept with you. One thing I never did is abandon my team with you. Not once did I jeer A-Rod with you. For Christ's sake, I never mumbled that maybe we needed a new manager with you.

One day, both of these teams will struggle for a period of a few, maybe even several years. I suspect that the Yankees' time may be right around the corner. When that time comes, we'll find out whose colors are true. Meanwhile, let's not fall into the trap of hating the other team more than we love our own.

Gregory Sullivan said...

When I say "you," I mean, "some Yankee fans." Just for the record.