6.19.2008

Paging J.J. Abrams

It started because I didn't know what to do with my hair this morning. It gets to a point, after 27 years of existence, that you're a little sick of what you've been given.

"Hair! Curly! Bah!" I thought to myself and did what I could to get past the challenge of pre-8a.m. styling.

Then I got into the subway and looked at the faces and hairstyles around me and a big fat truth smacked me across the face: everyone has their own version of the same problem. Some of the people in that subway this morning have been shaving the same face for 40 years! Some of them have been unhappy about the size of their nose for decades. We might not all be fed up with the same things, but we all hit a wall once in a while. I really believe that.

Sometimes when I'm in a public space like the subway, I imagine what we all must look like to an outsider's perspective. Like if an alien came down and hovered above our subway car; we are such charming little beings and I could name thousands of things that I think make humans so quirky and lovable (like the fact that we decorate our EARS with earrings or that we DESIRE for more than food and procreation or that we make time to TALK about life with friends).

I've been having some big thoughts lately and one way that I typically handle these kinds of weeks is going to the movies. I like to absorb myself in another life, a different story, and see how someone else works themselves out of problems and finds solutions.

Well this morning I was thinking about how my life is NOT a 2-hour scripted situation, how I have the possibility of writing my life pretty much however I damn well please. This is freeing, and yet at the same time, utterly intimidating because there isn't a director behind it all and I have no assurance that there's a love interest just after the commercial break. Which sort of explains why none of our lives end up quite as perfect as Felicity's.

I wouldn't trade it in, the freedom in choosing the way I want to build my life, for the knowledge of what's coming up around the corner. That's too dramatic (and not, to my knowledge, possible).

But I sure as hell wouldn't mind watching a teaser once in a while.

1 comment:

Erica said...

i could use a teaser as well ... the latest ups and downs haven't helped at all ...

PS - when i read the beginning of your post, i thought that you had cut off all your hair "a la Felicity season 2" !!!

PPS - i heart jj abrams.