Some nights when I can't sleep or while I make the long walk between Noah's room and ours, I think about this blog and how to write a few posts about some of the big changes going on in our lives. If I keep waiting for the perfect time, the post won't get written, so here's the imperfect post describing it all.
I'm leaving my job. I've got two more days this week and then I'm out.
The reasons I'm leaving my job are complex, but at the end of the day they have to do with a thousand pounds of introspection and hours of journaling which revealed that I want to own my own business.
Say what? I know. Just as things had settled into routine, as Noah got used to daycare and I got used to commuting and balancing work and life... But sometimes it takes a calm before a storm and sometimes it takes a quiet moment before your water breaks. And, metaphorically speaking, I think my professional water just broke and it's time for me to start hustling.
On Monday, September 9, I won't ride the train to work. Instead, Chris will leave the apartment with Noah and I'll sit here at my desk and labor through the work of starting a consulting business. Over the past 5+ years in my current role, I've learned more about people and the way they work together than I can say. I'm going to consult with small agencies and start-ups about their talent, to encourage them to find ways to communicate better, to wade in and get messy in employee handbooks and the challenge of managing people and, ultimately, I will help people work with people.
(DOESN'T THAT SOUND AMAZING? I mean, please. Dream job!)
I feel so deeply in my bones that this is a NEED in the world that it has driven me to leave my current job, a job I adore and am weepy to leave. Learning more about starting a business, as well as coaching humans through the trials of running their own, has me excited beyond belief. I'll share more here as things come together, but I'll also have a new channel of writing once my site is up. Stay tuned.
If I had more time, I'd have written a long post called "Anatomy of a Big Decision." I might also have created a playlist called "Songs to Decide By" or a reading list called "How To Figure Things Out." The last two months have emotionally stretched me far beyond what I found comfortable, but now I find a soft place here, between the creaks and the aches, and it no longer feels like pain. Now I'm feeling the burn.